Girl Detective
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
      ( 8:38 PM ) Girl Detective  

Homeless

We are, quite literally, without a home. Yesterday movers came to our condo in the morning and loaded up all our stuff. I did a quick but thorough cleaning, and we were gone, never to cross the threshold again.

It was the first place my husband and I owned, it was where our baby was conceived, it was where my water broke, and where all of us spent our first year as a family. But as I cleaned it, I realized that it was just an apartment. It's been time to move on for a while.

We closed this morning, in a quick and easy meeting that was even friendly with the new owner and his agent. But we don't close on our new house for nearly a month. In the meantime we're staying in a hotel and with family and friends. When we were asked, though, what our forwarding address was, we realized that we don't have one. We are in limbo till the middle of September, and thankful for mobile phones.


|       ( 8:28 PM ) Girl Detective  

Please, don't let me be misunderstood

I'm afraid that I might have given the impression in a previous post that I disdain Ikea and those who shop there. Not true, and I was too hard on Ikea and its shoppers.

I realized this when friends apologized to me after admitting they'd shopped there. I have to be careful where I point my rants.

Ikea can be a fun store, with some good design at reasonable prices. My issue is that when Ikea finally opened in Minnesota, people waited hours to get inside. There was a similar reaction when Krispy Kreme first opened here. I have no problem with frequenting these establishments. It's just waiting hours to do so that puzzles me.


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Wednesday, August 18, 2004
      ( 8:00 PM ) Girl Detective  

Not finishing books

I've started any number of books over the years that I haven't been able to get into--I stop after the first chunk of pages or chapters because the book just isn't drawing me in. Perhaps it's that I'm not in the mood for that type of book, perhaps because it's got a slow beginning, as some do, or perhaps I'm just not in the general mood for a book. So I either soldier through the slow beginning, or put it down and pick up something else--another book, a magazine, a comic. But there's another, final possibility, and that is that I simply do not like the book. In the past I would read the book anyway. I would finish because once I'm made it past that beginning point, reading was like a contract--a bet with the author that they could teach me something, or surprise me, or prove me wrong for doubting them. Lately, though, I'm not up for the contract. Life with a baby is life with far less time, and I don't want to waste that on things I don't enjoy. I read A Fistful of Rain by Greg Rucka, then The Secret Life of Bees by Sue Monk Kidd. I didn't like either and finished both anyway, to my regret. I then read Father Melancholy's Daughter by Gail Godwin, recommended to me long ago by my mom. It had some good stuff, and some annoying. The main character's voice and that of her boyfriend were far too mature for their years. The author tried to explain this, but I didn't buy it. Next I picked up the sequel, Evensong. I read just enough to realize that the things I'd found annoying in the last book were magnified. I read a fair way in, then realized that I wasn't enjoying it, so I took it back to the library and moved on. Next I picked up Life of Pi, by Yann Martel. I persevered; the reviews had been so glowing that I thought I just had to get into it. Yet two-thirds of the way through, I was still non-plussed. I had zero emotional connection to the main character. And the voice was not that of a young boy in danger, but rather of a clever, nearly omniscient narrator. The voice was neither compelling nor believable. Again, I stopped reading.

I didn't realize quite how long the list of disappointing books was till I was in the midst of writing this. I think the last book I enjoyed, finished and thought was well-written was Rainlight by Alison McGhee. So I've started Shadow Baby, the sequel, in the hope of coming out of my rut.


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Tuesday, August 17, 2004
      ( 11:32 AM ) Girl Detective  

Jeans


The purpose of jeans is to make your butt look good. Don't let anyone tell ya different.

I went shopping for clothes for the first time since quitting my job over two months ago. I had a simple mission: a new pair of jeans, not too expensive. I wanted to get a pair that are long enough to wear with sassy heels. According to fashion gurus, unless they're cropped, jean hems should skim the floor to elongate the leg. My current favorite pair is regular length, and thus can only be worn with flats.

My husband, baby and I made our way down the street we are soon not going to be close to anymore. We started at Neiman's Last Call. Very few jeans at all, in mostly weird styles, and all Euro sizes, so I had no idea what to take to the dressing room. (Vague memories that Guess jeans in high school were also in those sizes.) Then on to Saks Off Fifth. Lots of styles, mostly WAY low cut and again with the confusing Euro sizes. The baby began to express his displeasure about the non-baby nature of the baby adventure. I began to despair of finding a pair of jeans that could accomodate my booty and thighs.

Next and final stop was the Gap, where I should have gone in the first place. Nice, normal sizes, accessible signs, helpful staff who recommended I try a different style and go down a size from what I was trying. Voila. Success. I got the regular length again, and was advised not to put them in the dryer to maintain their length.


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Monday, August 16, 2004
      ( 9:46 AM ) Girl Detective  

Can someone help me out?


I think my reading capacity may be broken. I'm in the middle of Life of Pi by Yann Martel, which has gotten a slew of acclaim. It's a young adult novel that crossed over to adult readership, so it's not only a genre I like but also a good model for my own novel in progess.

Yet I don't like it.

Has anyone out there read it and liked it? Am I missing something?


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Sunday, August 15, 2004
      ( 8:43 PM ) Girl Detective  

We've got a deal


My husband and I had a long, dark, tea-time of the soul last week as we wondered whether to walk away from the house with a radon problem that the owner was refusing to even help to fix. While we pondered, we exceeded our 24 hour response time, at which point the owner could have sought other buyers. Instead, they contacted our agent with an offer to pay an amount equal to half of a less expensive radon fix than the one that's been recommended to us.

Because of the drain tile they have in the basement, the less expensive radon fixes might create a backdraft of CO2 from the chimney. So we're opting for the more expensive, non-backdraft option. But they did offer to do something, so we decided to go forward rather than to withdraw and start all over again.

It's going to be a hectic month, with closing on our place, going to a hotel, me and the baby leaving town again, returning to a hotel and closing on the new place, plus moving our stuff out and into storage then into the new house. But in about a month, we'll be the owners of a 1917 2-story craftsman-style bungalow.

Then I'm sure we can just relax and enjoy, right?


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Thursday, August 12, 2004
      ( 7:35 AM ) Girl Detective  

House thought of the moment


Somebody's got to buy that jerk's house. It might as well be us, the cute happy family with the cute (mostly) happy baby. Just because the owners are jerks doesn't mean it's a bad house.


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Wednesday, August 11, 2004
      ( 10:14 PM ) Girl Detective  

Mean people suck

We had a radon test on our new potential house. It came back high, and the recommended fix is a couple thousand dollars. We put that on our request for the buyers, and they refused. Our agent spoke with their agent. He was upset with his clients. He'd advised them to compromise in some way, but they were both standing firm, in spite of our having made a full-price offer and allowed them to keep their requested closing date, 25 days later than ours.

If we have to pay for the radon fix, then it's one more expense on top of a bunch of others that we already know about. It's an older house, so we can be fairly certain there will be some surprises that we haven't foreseen, too, so the costs keep going up.

Going beyond the immature reaction of telling these people to get bent, I seriously wonder if we want to be giving money to people who are jerks. In theory, if we just make it to closing and they leave the house in the shape it was for the inspection, then we'd have the house, which is what we want. But dealing with these people at all fills me with concern. Yes, we're buying a house, not the buyers, but we do have to deal with them at least one more time, and with a house that they leave for us. Earlier tonight I felt that we should take the high road and do what we need to do to close on this house. Now, though, I'm filled with doubt. These people, and by extension their house and the financial transaction, aren't reasonable and don't feel reliable.

I think we've got three options: buy the house with the jerky owners; pass on it and continue looking; pass on it and take a break from looking for some period of time, say six months or a year, since we have to move twice anyway. At this moment, I'm leaning to the latter, because after three months of looking we found three houses: one that was already sold, one that the agent encouraged multiple bids on, which we lost, and this one with jerky owners. I'm worn out, I'm worn down, and renting is sounding awfully good right now.


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Tuesday, August 10, 2004
      ( 9:40 AM ) Girl Detective  

Feeling Minnesota

As we prepared to sell our condo and buy a house over the past months, we considered all options, which boiled down to three: remain in MN, move to OH by my family, or to PA by his. As we've gone through this first year with the baby, we've found it awfully difficult to manage on our own. We're introverts, we don't live physicallly close to other families, and we're not good at asking for help. Also, living near family is good both for family to see the baby, and for the baby, who gets to know his relatives better. Moving to either PA or OH would mean that we were closer to the other than we have been in MN.

After much deliberation, my husband and I decided that we'd like to stay in Minnesota. First, he has a job here already; finding a new one would be a big, uncertain variable were we to move. Second, I've lived in Ohio and we've both lived in PA. While there are lovely things about them, we wouldn't even be thinking about moving if not for family.

The more we discussed it, the more we realized that we really like it here. We like the weather, the politics, the convenience, the organic food, the restaurants, the movie theaters, the used book stores, our friends, the ice cream. The schools are good here. The house that we hope to buy is located within walking distance of a decent neighborhood restaurant, a public library, two parks, and a food co-op.

Staying in MN means we'll have to work harder--at building community with other families, at visiting our extended families. Perhaps we've made a mistake and will have to move again in a few years. But based on the best guess we have now, it feels like we're doing the right thing. All we can do is see how things play out, and keep an open mind for what unfolds.


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Monday, August 09, 2004
      ( 9:46 AM ) Girl Detective  

House update


Our offer on the house was accepted, provided that we close on their date, which is three weeks beyond when we close here. So we have to move twice, and store our stuff. The price tag for this whole crazy process goes up and up. We had the house inspected. While the stuff is mostly minor, there are rather a lot of minor things, including a high radon reading. Now we begin the negotiation on what they'll fix before they go, and what we'll need to pay for once we're there. I hope they're going to be more amenable to repairs than they were to the difference in closing dates.

The kitchen is going to be a challenge. It has no counters and no cabinets. Literally. Both those things are in a small pantry off the kitchen, which houses only a sink, a range, a radiator and a window. Not even a fridge--it's in a cubby off to the side.

The good news is that it's an older house with lots of character. It's in great shape, even considering its age. I looked at lots of younger houses that were rickety; this one is solid. Also, the current owner has taken care to preserve the nature of the house. It's in a good neighborhood, just a few blocks from two nice parks with good jungle gyms and toddler pools.

I continue to remain cautiously optimistic. There's a lot of stuff that can go awry between now and closing, but I think we'll be able to manage.


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Wednesday, August 04, 2004
      ( 12:19 PM ) Girl Detective  

We found another house; now we wait


The third house I looked at yesterday was a good one. The agent and I made plans for a second visit so my husband could look at it, and we signed a purchase agreement. We asked for a closing date in August, but they want September, and don't want to accomodate us in any way even if we do agree to be the ones who move twice. Interim housing and storage will likely cost us a couple of grand. If we want any leeway or consideration, they say they'll wait till the next offer comes in.

This whole process is making me feel ill. Why can't people just be nice?


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Tuesday, August 03, 2004
      ( 11:49 AM ) Girl Detective  

Highs and hells of househunting


We close in three weeks on our condo, and we haven't yet found a place. Time is running out, and the mood swings are getting more extreme. I start the morning hopeful, then crash around noon, pick up again in the afternoon, and crash again when we go out and see more stuff that doesn't work. Then at night I am exhausted, but have trouble falling asleep. Do we look into rentals now, or wait till after this weekend if we still haven't found a place? The baby hates driving around, and generates some truly painful shrieks while we try to explore neighborhoods. I am brought low by wondering if we will ever find a place that will compare favorably to the one we got outbid on. Our agent says she has never yet looked at so many houses with a client.

I am able to know that we don't really have problems. Yes, it will be a pain if we don't find a house, or disappointing if we find one and feel that we're settling, but these are inconveniences, not problems. We may have to move twice, pay for storage, take a longer lease than we'd like. These can all be managed.

But if you're wondering why I haven't posted, it's probably because I'm out chasing another listing. The good thing about our long hunt is that we've learned a lot in the process: we don't like houses with a master bedroom up and the rest down; we don't want a long drive anywhere; we may have to settle for just one bath; "gleaming hardwood," new appliances and new carpet are easy fixes that sellers use to cover up shoddy properties; we shouldn't ever rule out a house based on air conditioning or lack thereof; we like the character of older houses but our price range means that they are usually still pretty rickety; we are not fixer-upper people.

So we're looking for 3 bedrooms on one floor, more than one bath, updated enough to move in and not have to do major or immediate work, with more than 1500 square feet, in a reasonably safe neighborhood, and within our price range, which has inched up over our time of looking out of desperation. I am annoyed by how difficult it has been to find this combination of features. Over the course of our hunt, we've found two properties that fit: one had already sold the morning that we looked at it, and the other we got outbid on.

I really should probably be looking into rentals right now, shouldn't I?


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Girl Detective the person is a titian-haired sleuth, intent on fathoming the mysteries of the world at large, with particular (and some might say obsessive) attention paid to the mundane details of female life.

Girl Detective the weblog is not about girl detectives; sorry if you came here looking for that. It is, however, an homage to the inquisitive nature, untiring spirit and passion for justice that marked these great literary heroines.

Girl Detective the weblog is a forum to practice my writing. It is about whatever strikes me on any given day. I am a woman writing for other women. If guys find it interesting, bravo. If not, that makes sense, but don't complain.

All material here is copyright 2002-2004 Girl Detective.

other things I've written
I was pregnant. Now I've got a baby.
Review of Angle of Repose
Reviews at Amazon.com

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